Immediate intervention techniques in session

Trance states can arise in session when couples are confronted with intense emotions or painful memories. These states are characterised by a loss of contact with the present, plunging the partners into an emotional and temporal “elsewhere”. Here are a few techniques to bring couples back to the here and now.

1 — Using the physical environment

• Changing position: encouraging the partners to change position or to stand up can help break the cycle of symmetrical interaction.
• Sensory reconnection: asking the partners to focus on their senses, such as the sensations of touch or the surrounding sounds, can anchor them in the present moment.

2 — Verbal anchoring

• Naming the present: using statements that re-invite and anchor the partners in the present.
• Anchoring questions: asking simple questions about the immediate environment, or asking each partner for something pragmatic, to interrupt the symmetrical escalation.
• Voice register: lowering one’s tone as far as possible into the low registers, and avoiding climbing into higher pitches during moments of escalating tension.

Long-term and preventive strategies

Preventing conflicts is crucial for the long-term well-being of relationships. Identifying the triggers of trance and conflict allows therapists and couples to defuse situations before they escalate.

In conclusion

Managing conflicts and trance states in couple therapy is a crucial skill for therapists. By integrating immediate interventions to defuse tensions and long-term strategies to prevent their recurrence, therapists can help couples navigate the turbulence of their relationship more effectively.

Couple therapy, moreover, is not limited to resolving conflicts: it also aims to strengthen the partners’ skills, so that they can handle future challenges autonomously.

I detail these techniques in the episode — in French — below.